We want someone suitable for him, but ultimately who he marries is his choice. I met my husband through my parents, who arranged my marriage.
They set up my profile with their email account, looked through the available women, received requests from some girls and forwarded the ones they liked.
Once you finished your education, you were ready to get married. Then your parents checked the suitor’s background and asked your permission if you liked the match. I moved back to Toronto this past summer after spending the past two years in Karachi with my family, and one of the things I was looking forward to was getting on dating websites, because it’s a normal and acceptable thing to do in Canada.
In Pakistan, you’re limited to the people you already know through your family connections, and the guy has all the power. Shaadi asks about your complexion, and that tells you right away that it’s a South Asian dating site.
I thought that was just a security measure, but because the privacy settings are so difficult to navigate, without my realizing it my phone number was posted on my profile.
Some guy called me and said, “I don’t know what your name is but this is your handle on Shaadi.” He seemed sketchy—he was calling from an unknown number, and he insisted that we keep talking.