That's not filling.)Cybersex, on the other hand, is active – interactive – and it involves a lot more than just your visual cortex.
Good cybersex requires imagination, communication, emotion. It always involves an element of suspense, because you can't be certain what the other person is going to do.
Already it's easy to find people who watch a lot of porn or stay up all night chatting, but who feel no compulsion to do so now.
And among those, you'll find plenty of stories about how their involvement in the online sexual underground resulted in positive changes in their offline sex lives.
But most people have not been online nearly that long; the percentage of American households with internet access didn't reach 50 percent until 2000.
Considering how sophisticated our online sex technology has become, and how easy it is for newbies to find it, perhaps it's not surprising that we're experiencing a temporary epidemic., researchers John Bargh and Katelyn Mc Kenna conclude that a rise in depression upon first using the internet is followed by increased happiness and real-world social activity among regular internet users – but that initial year or two seems to be a doozy for those who get carried away.
But soon strange avatars were coming up to us and “kissing” us, “touching” us and asking us to come to their hotel rooms where it carried on.
After a while we got to know how to talk like they did and started “doing” things to other players – always without consent. Not for one second did we imagine that these weren’t teenage boys, or consider why the people behind the screens were asking to add us on MSN Messenger.
It all started out innocently, chatting to other players about school and other teenage things.Having recently tried to find good cybersex myself, I see why it's taking them so long. In the olden days, you could find chat rooms where adults bantered, flirted and seduced one another in a supportive community.People developed relationships that ranged from casual friendship to erotic involvement to love affairs.But I would expect a premium site with almost 16 million members to have at least one interesting chat room, wouldn't you?And good cyber must still exist, if 8 million people are addicted to it.We've been talking about that in the forum, too.Porn is passive entertainment, and you seek it out as individuals or couples (or groups, I suppose) as something to inspire arousal and perhaps fulfillment.The problem is that it's hard to figure out exactly what researchers mean when they talk about online sex addiction.To me, porn and cybersex are such completely different animals, pursued for different reasons, that lumping them together doesn't give us any real answers about what people actually find addictive.What's so alluring about porn, or cybersex, that we cling to it in such massive numbers?Or is this just an obsession with the novelty of virtual sex, a rash of "addiction" that will wear itself out in the next few years?