Apart from marriage, the lasting commitment is absent and the sex act becomes a false expression, a lie.
Every act of sex outside of marriage cheapens both sex and marriage.
Sex is a good thing which, when it occurs outside its God-designed boundaries, becomes bad. We’re sinners who can pervert, abuse, and rip away from their proper place the good things God created.
Having consistently practiced this when they were dating, it was impossible for us and for our daughters to imagine them dating a young man without first openly addressing with him all the principles that follow.God’s Word speaks openly of the pleasure of sex within the marriage relationship (Proverbs ,19; Song of Solomon 4:5; 7:1, 6-9).We shouldn’t be ashamed to talk about what God wasn’t ashamed to create.When exercised in line with God’s intended purpose, it is beautiful and constructive.When out of control, violating God’s intended purpose, it becomes ugly and destructive.Sex is a privilege inseparable from the responsibilities of the sacred marriage covenant.To exercise the privilege apart from the responsibility perverts God’s intention for sex.The more involved you are in serving Christ, the greater vested interests Satan has in destroying you and God’s work in and through you.The evil one wants to take you down to use your life as a bad example to other Christians, who will imitate your moral compromise.“But we really love each other” has no bearing on the ethics of sexual intimacy—sex does not become permissible through subjective feelings, but through the objective lifelong commitment of marriage. Your sexual purity is essential to your walk with God. There is no sense seeking God’s will in other areas when you are choosing to live in sexual impurity in your mind or body. If you are not living in sexual purity, God will not hear your other prayers until you offer the prayer of confession and repentance and commit yourself to a life of holiness (1 John 1:9). And if you don’t think it can, it almost certainly will.Sexual purity is not an option for an obedient Christian, it’s a requirement. "Pride goes before destruction, a haughty spirit before a fall.” (Proverbs ) "So, if you think you are standing firm, be careful that you don’t fall! watch yourself, or you also may be tempted.” (Galatians 6:1) If you think you’ll never be burglarized, you’ll fail to take precautions to keep it from happening. Years ago there was scuttlebutt about an international “hit list,” a calculated plan for paid assassins to murder strategic world leaders.