You can’t rewrite the rulebook to satisfy your own desires.No Time to Mess Around SEE ALSO: Sex and the Single Person But there is a deeper issue at work here. I thought of that book for the first time in many years when I read your note. Last week one of the presidential candidates said that America’s great failing is that we have lost the concept of giving ourselves to a cause greater than our own self-interest. And in the church somehow we have lost sight of the incredible adventure of serving Christ with nothing held back—to be so consumed in the Lord and his holy cause that lesser things fall away. Do I believe that the rules of life were made for my ultimate benefit?Those are basically the rules we all have to follow.Not just the Bible rules, but the common rules of the Christian faith.I don’t approve of this nor do I think it is wise, but I cannot deny the reality. 5) I’m not surprised that the two of you enjoy being intimate. It’s not wrong to have sex and it’s certainly not wrong to enjoy it. They just don’t matter because they will always lead you back to the bedroom.Not that every Christian couple in your situation sleeps together, but it does happen. And of course, if you have sex with someone you care about, you’ll enjoy it and feel good about it. 8) I gather that your real issue is, “Why don’t we feel convicted by the Holy Spirit?I received an email from a man who asked a very particular question. He met a Christian woman who seems to be an answer to prayer.Over time they have fallen in love and hope to get married eventually. "We have been intimate and are feeling guilty that we DON’T feel convicted by the Holy Spirit that it has been wrong." He goes on to say they waited to have sex until they knew they were in love.
10) If you are truly in love, then get married and make it legal.In the great cosmic scheme of things, it just doesn’t matter.Compared with the economic crisis, Russia’s invasion of Georgia, a national election coming up, and soldiers fighting and dying in Iraq, on one level, it just doesn’t matter whether or not two people sleep together. The world goes on spinning whether you guys sleep together or whether you don’t.He says they are not just young adults looking for a free pass to have sex.For the first time they both feel they have found a partner that they love and enjoy in every way. So why shouldn’t two adult Christians who happen to be divorced and have fallen in love—why shouldn’t they sleep together? My own answer begins in a way that may surprise you, but I hope you will read through all the way to the end. My Answer to This Question Dear Friend, Thanks for your note.4) And that leads to the point about your friends making you feel guilty. ” But I think you do or else why would you write me?And why would you take the time to justify yourself?People assume that in some discreet way, having fallen in love, two people in their forties will have sex.3) And even in the Christian world, there is a great deal of winking at this point. I understand that Christian singles sometimes date and then have sex. “Being intimate” seems a lot more acceptable than “fornication." 6) There is a great deal of biblical support for regarding sex as a gracious gift from God, meant for procreation and as part of what it means to become “one flesh.". Outside the fireplace, that same fire will burn down the house.Odd place for me to begin, but it is undoubtedly true.2) The world certainly expects that if you love each other, you will sleep together.